Honestly, I think I'm just being a big retard about this whole thing. I'm beginning to wonder if that one night two Sundays ago was just that, one night. We went to a party today where he payed attention to me if necessary. He flirted with Paul who he dated for like, a week awhile ago. He sat with Ryan on his lap and seemed pretty pleased with himself. I don't know. Kevin has been absolutely no help recently. He's playing the perfect best friend to Nathaniel and saying nothing one way or the other. So, I have no clue if I should even try or give up. I thought maybe he would want to hang out after the party you know, especially since he drove and had a great excuse... What should I think? God dammit I'm such a retard. I'm clearly not who he wants to be with. I'm not even sure if he really wants to be my friend. I can't read him at all. I chose the dumbest thing to start talking to him on AIM, and he gave a response typical of him. Then I said something else and predicted his response which happened to be the one with the least effort required. I'm debating whether or not I should just flat out ask him.
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